Telling People You Are Changing

When I told people I had resigned, so began the recurring conversation cycle:

Me: No, I won’t be at the AGM this year, I’ve resigned and leave soon.

Oh really, why? [Insert pity face]

Me: Just want to do something different.

Like what?

Me: I don’t know yet.

What do you want to do?

Me: I don’t know yet.

Oh ok… well… Good luck with that [Insert she’s bonkers face]

For military personnel this can go on for a number of months as we have plenty of time to go on courses and re-acclimatise ourselves to civilian life – a privilege I am most grateful for as this has allowed me the space to answer the standard questions posed above.

But even before I had those answers, I would still finish that type of conversation with a smile because I know, in that moment, I am daring bravely (Sorry Brene Brown, I smooshed your phrase but it seemed to work for me).

And if I were to think more objectively about those responsive questions from colleagues, I feel no ill will towards them. Awkward small talk aside, they are genuinely interested and I have found this to be for one of two reasons:

1) They think I’ve got balls and they wouldn’t dream of leaving the comfort of a steady income, potential promotion prospects and the security of an organisation with overarching responsibility. Even though, literally if you drop down dead tomorrow, they would be scanning the manning pool for a replacement by close of play that day.

Secretly they would do the same in a heartbeat if they had the courage.

2) They think I have betrayed the tribe and you and your grandiose career aspirations can leave by the nearest exit. Because, they would never dream of leaving the comfort of a steady income, potential promotion prospects and the security of an organisation with overarching responsibility….

And secretly, they would do the same in a heartbeat… if they had the courage.

PHASE #1 COMPLETE

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