If you’re a Service Leaver, Veteran or Reservist who is adapting to life after the military, my weekly emails will help you.
Who am I?
I think life is so hard and unfair, it’s not even anything I do or don’t do. Nothing seems to go right and everyone else makes it more difficult. I can’t change anything and I am so stuck. I’ll just do nothing then! There are plenty of others who will just take over. They think I don’t have anything worthwhile to contribute anyway…
I am a VICTIM
Who am I?
I want to fly like an eagle but I am surrounded by turkeys. They always mess things up even when I told them how to do it. I know the best way to do things and they just don’t listen and look what happens! They will pay for that and regret it. Now I have to do everything around here, all because people just can’t follow directions.The word “Stressed” doesn’t even cover it!
I am a PERSECUTOR
Who am I?
Don’t worry I am here, I will fix it for you. It was probably my fault anyway, I should have explained myself better. This often happens, but I always own up to it and make it all better. See, I like to help everyone and show them the best way to do it, I don’t like to see people struggle. I am very dependable like that, if only people would appreciate me more for all my extra hard work.
I am a RESCUER
What am I?
I give people space – to make mistakes, to learn and to change their habits and behaviour. I ask lots of questions so people can get to the bottom of their problem, find their own solutions and become self-sufficient. I will ask “How can I help?” and negotiate those terms – Not dive in and take over.
I start a conversation, not finish up with my version of the best advice.
I practice patience. This is really challenging sometimes as I do want to help and get things done quickly. But I know that wouldn’t help anyone to be successful or earn the respect I need to do my work.
I am practicing LEADERSHIP – by remaining outside of the Drama Triangle.
It’s not always about who you are, it’s what you do that has the greatest impact.
What are you?
And what do you wish could do better?
GREAT! Now you have decided, what are you going to do about it?
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