Disagreement v’s conflict, because there’s two ways to unload a gun

“How might disagreement be a good thing?” Was the question asked in a group call and we proceeded to open up a safe space for debate, free from judgement.

I have been saddened recently by our skill fade in the ability to debate and the rise of cancel culture.  And this all gave way to seeking to understand what all these terms and vocabulary mean, because on any given day, for any given emotional state, the same word can mean a variety of things.

Is judgement about making wise fact based decisions, or is it more opinion?  Or both?

Are we feeling a fear of offending by way of differing opinion?  And is it not disagreement that has led to powerful change?  If we all agreed, would things just not stay the same?

How might being right involve too much ego and judgement?  Whereas, to feel understood or to seek to understand comes a place of curiosity, when you have opportunities for being challenged by others in an intentional way.

How might you begin to diversify your inputs?  Seeking out people and ideas that differ from your own so they can help you see the blind spots and where you might be wrong.  Because, what if they were right?

Can we do judgement better?  In a fair and just manner.  And reduce the divisive polarisation and shift more towards the drama class improvisation exercise.  Playing the, “Yes, and..” game – to allow the other person the space to reply and leaves the conversation open.  And if you finish your disagreement, and have learned something about each other, you can go for a beer, shake hands or even hug (when we are allowed), would that mean you’ve met the aim of disagreeing with grace?

I wonder if there could be an app for that. A place to be matched up with a polar opposite opinion and have spirited debate and be ok with it, not get triggered or trolled.  Like Tinder but for thinkers.  You could call it Polar.  If there’s any techies out there feel free to move forward with that one.  No royalties required.

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