People haven’t been in your head for the past week…  They need the recap.

If you’re a Service Leaver or Veteran who is adapting to life after the military and you want to level up your leadership, my weekly emails will help you.

Often we run through things and thoughts in our heads and then seek out the opinion of trusted friend and allies who know and understand us.

And yep… They don’t get it.

“Why don’t they understand me?”, you might ask.

Well, let’s consider the facts. You have run through several scenarios and have the backstory in your head. You know what triggered your thinking and why it’s important. You see the World in your way from your POV.

This is context. This is the foundations of your thinking and it’s often overlooked because it comes so naturally. And often we assume everyone else shares that same context.

So, when you blurt out your big idea or radical thoughts to others, we tend to skip over this vital piece of the story.

Ok, diving in with a juicy nugget of info will get their attention, but it’s important to remember to circle back to the context with a quick overview of the highlights to bring them up to speed.

Then you can engage them with delight and wonderment.

Which then begs the question, what did you tell them for in the first place?

Do you need validation or permission? Are you seeking evaluation or praise?
Or how might you need more coaching feedback? Some challenging questions to get you thinking deeply about your plans.

It’s worth remembering that when you tell people stuff they will be compelled to offer a response. That’s communication 101.


So, it pays to be clear and upfront about why you are telling this person, this thing, at this time. State your intentions and what’s expected in return.

That way, it’s less frustrating for you and more inviting for them.

If you have been forwarded this by a friend, they thought of you and you can subscribe here.

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